I think I might be gay.
Well good for you! Now lets figure out if you really are. Do you have an overwhelming desire to decorate? Teach your female co-workers how to dress? Cut hair or scream “girlfriend”. Well who cares – none of those things indicate you are gay. Only your heart knows for sure and it will tell you when the time comes.
So have you had an encounter with a man? Did you like it? Well guess what – that doesn’t mean anything either. No matter what they tell you there are scads of straight men who have had sexual encounters with other men and are not gay. Homosexuality is an activity in my mind, not a lifestyle. A blow job in the park does not a gay man make.
Gayness is not determined by a list of actions or thoughts. Gayness is a way one is. A gay person was born this way (no matter what the Christian Wrong says) and there is no changing it. Did you hear that Exodus? You cannot change being gay. You can choose to live in the closet and not live a gay life style – that is the only choice you have in this – but you cannot change the basic fact that one is or is not gay.
But how do you know. Well although this may not seem helpful at first – but the answer to that is – you just know. It took me years to come out to myself after knowing that I found myself looking at men more than women – after wondering what a kiss from my best friend would be like – after being hugged by a man and feeling at home in his arms. I just knew.
The most important thing to realize is that there is nothing wrong with the fact that you might be gay. There have been famous, successful, wonderful gay people since the beginning of time. The days of society telling us we are perverts are over. (well they still tell us that but we now know they are wrong). We are created the way we are and have the right and possibility of living productive and happy lives out in the open.
My advice to you is to allow life to happen – don’t hold back – don’t lose your sense of wonder – be open to new people and new things – and never ever allow society, an employer, a family member, or anything else tell you what and how you should be. Be you – and one day soon – you will know – you just will.
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